Author: sweettems

Work Reset

Work had me feeling like I’d travelled back in time today. First it seemed I had completely backtracked with a coworker who was again somehow thinking it was my job to do his team’s patching coordination. And then I received an email from a coworker who had left the company a few months ago. He appears to be in the exact same position again, and everyone’s acting like nothing happened.

I actually checked through my old emails to find his farewell letter to be sure I wasn’t having a stroke or something. Nope, there was the email. I guess that other company didn’t work out…

So anyway, I guess I’m still here in 2025. I had the slightest hope I was reset back to before the 2024 election for a second there. If only.

The Love Of Strangers

I realized something this morning.

The best Christmas my family ever had when I was growing up was the one time my parents actually accepted help. To them, the reason we kids enjoyed it so much was because we were given more than we deserved. We were spoiled, and happy about it.

That wasn’t it. In fact, it really wasn’t that much at all.

It was the thoughtfulness they, possibly even strangers, put into the gifts.

It was the feeling of actually being seen.

Care from strangers > “care” from parents.

Even Plastic Surgery Wasn’t Enough

Today I tried to use Sora to create an image showing how it feels trying to meet expectations as a woman in today’s society. It’s not perfect, but I think it gets the point across.

Injections, plastic surgery, plenty of makeup, great hair of course… you get the idea.

By contrast, I feel like a suit and a quick brush is all that’s needed for many men to feel presentable.

He looks so happy…

Not a Flower Girl

Despite being a female, I’m not too into your typical floral scents like rose and lavender. You’re aghast, I’m sure. So it’s not especially easy for me to find fragrant products that I really like. I usually go for citrus or other fruits, more earthy plants like tea tree and eucalyptus, or those that are common to eat like vanilla, cinnamon, etc.

And I’m guessing my preferred scent profile isn’t very common, as it seems that the scented items I find I like aren’t usually sold for very long. This would point to the need to stock up whenever I find something I’m really fond of, right? Except not only are some items, like perfumes, expensive for buying multiples at a time, but this has also burned me in the past. It turns out, some bath and body products (such as Bath & Body Works’ Be Enchanted, which I love) contain something that I’m apparently pretty allergic to. The problem is, which ingredient I’m allergic to, or what products contain said ingredient and will eventually have me sneezing and cursing while trying to look through incredibly itchy, watery, and painful eyes is not apparent.

So alas, even when I find a lotion or perfume or what-have-you that I really like, and it’s on sale so that I can buy several of them,… it’s not until after I’ve gotten home and used the item a couple times that I find out the wonderful smell is actually going to do me dirty. Then I have to give away the beautiful-smelling products to someone else whose body isn’t going to go crazy over… whatever the hell it is that mine doesn’t like.

And this is why a perfume that I love (even though it does have some florals) – Poppy by Coach – is sitting on my dresser close to empty but seldom touched. I love the bright, playful smell of Poppy, it doesn’t cause my face to explode nasty liquids, and it’s in a pretty yet not expensive little decanter. And of course Coach stopped making it so I’ve only been using it for special occasions – for years.

For this particular product though, Chat GPT just told me that there may be an alternative – a possible knockoff fragrance on Amazon called Catch for Women. I’ve put it in my shopping cart and am hoping for the best. Wish me luck.

Patience – I had that Once

I’m a pretty impatient person. At least, I am now. As a kid, I was always the last in my family for everything, as my mom would say “littles first” no matter what it was. This meant that anything (at least anything good) was done or handed out by age, starting with the youngest – so I was consistently dead last as the eldest child. Mum insisted on doing this as she bemoaned that the younger ones would cry if they had to wait a mere second. It sucked, and still does, as this taught my youngest siblings to not have any patience, even now as adults. I’ve noticed how their careers have been impacted and it bugs the hell out of me.

But it wasn’t just at home. It seemed adults were always telling me to wait for this and that when I was young. I imagine that’s pretty typical, but it sure feels like I got to wait more than others. I remember a class where I patiently waited the entire period as the teacher never did get back to me. He lauded me for how good I was about it, but even so… it’s not like it wasn’t hard for me – an hour wasted, standing and bored out of my mind. I just wanted to do my best, and that meant following what I was told.

So now I feel like whatever patience I was allotted for my lifetime was already used up in my childhood. I don’t sit by the window expecting Amazon packages to appear immediately after I click the order button or anything like that, but with how fast things, such as the internet can be, when they take longer than usual I do start to get annoyed…

And thus I’m sitting here writing this as a means to get my irritated mind off of waiting for ChatGPT to generate an image, lol!